Thursday, February 17, 2011
So as I do this blog with Smoothie King in hand (Mango flavored …if you’re curious) I’m challenged with the ever unusual but possibly profound thought.
As I perused Facebook in my efforts to thwart the load of task that await me I see this….
(CENSORED) “is wondering… if tomatoes are a fruit, isn’t ketchup technically a smooothie??? LMAO!”
this seems profound in thought………..yet very hypertensive……..oddly I had an urge for a bloody mary at the time……….don’t judge.
I spent many a days as child pondering what family this edible creation belonged to. Was it a vegetable as we often assumed? or was a ….dare I ponder it…..a FRUIT!? (insert dramatic music here)
I mean it always made its way to many vegetable oriented sites….usually hand in hand with lettuce……….but to consider it a citrus affiliate? did that mean that a fruit had snuck its way onto our burgers…tacos….QUESO!?….I mean is it too a mischievous fruit like the pineapple who assaulted our pizzas and then used affirmative action to solidify its existence by race calling the pizza Hawaiian.
Though it tis true it is still oddly hard to fathom due to childhood because for many years most of us thought it to be vegetable………Had VEGGIE TALES lied to us all these years!?!?……were the really FRUITY TALES……..hmmmm (adjust tie) but anyway …back to the point.
Of course I’m sure someone is thinking NAAA what about V8 juices………….I won’t get into the politics…..plus I don’t like when my vegetables have numbers in them…but remember it says JUICES…..this feels contradictory to me now. >_< but law so has it that we tend to call it veggies at time….but is this just a massive government conspiracy……….who knows….maybe the government will shut my site down for the exposure of such precious information…so I’ll digress from this…
but is ketchup technically a smoothie? possibly …sprinkle some protein powder maybe……..freeze it….add some ice and sugar…………..naaaa that just be nasty…..but give it to Mikey he’ll eat anything. (Yes I just did that….if you get the joke there.)
This blog was brought to you by….Let-Go………like that last drop of ketchup in the bottle….sometimes you just got to Let it go….
Stay tuned....for Intern has had a new venture.
Monday, February 14, 2011
Friday, February 11, 2011
In our last adventure titled ATTACK OF THE CREEPER, you may recall the hilarious but hair raising goosebump and tingling tale of our awesome intern and her bout with THE CREEPER who made an eager attempt at the end of the day to get a hug from her after engaging in an random but A&B conversation between me and her.
Welp folks………the adventures of intern has not ended there for THE CREEPER STRIKES AGAIN! …….of course for respect and privacy……..and to prevent future creepers who may read this from going after her…….I maintain anonymity of all people….even me haha…but this tale is shorter
So ….once upon time…..wait………forget that its not one of those………Sooo it is was a cool mid day Friday at the job of which seemed rather progressive. I had just came back from being in the field with my lunch in hand of choice beverage Hi-c (don’t judge) and the intern was steady working hard and making hard work for herself by choice might I add. I had forgotten that a routine firedrill was scheduled for today but as the alarm chirped and non-epileptic friendly lights flashed…I proceeded, while sipping my Hi-C, to follow the routine protocol of meeting in the hall exit stairwell until further notice.
As i proceeded I came across intern in the hall. She told me how she was “just then Hungry”, this of course after me badgering her early to get some food. We proceeded to crack a few jokes….me still encouraging her OCD plight of working still to get food. In the mist of our banter the fire drill is called to an end for what seemed like the fastest drill we ever had.
We began walking back into the office, I still drinking my Hi-C (don’t hate) when all of a sudden I see in my peripherals a hand comes across and place itself on the shoulder of intern. Paying little mind to origins of the hand, I proceeded to drink my drink but soon I’m body checked into the wall on my right and arm wraps itself around my left arm. I’m a little disoriented in the moment from being blind sided but as I look to my left I see a face in sheer terror and confusion with a dash of laughter. Startled I realized that it is the INTERN and her look confuses me but soon my mind clicks as it traces the origins of the hand to………you got it….. THE CREEPER! this time he had taken a new tactic….he snuck up from behind and pulled a arm around the shoulders….his idea of being friendly “I guess”…………..Intern was terrified but NOT having it and with ungodly adrenaline based strenght had body checked (Full hockey) into me…….and if your wondering about my HI-C….all drops were retained…..anyway..
She proceeds to wrap her arm through mine and we look to shades from a high school prom date as I realize I’m being used as cover with her arm entangled in mine…….I proceed to sip my drink while chuckling under my breath. She was a little miffed by that but fear of creeper overrides that. We start to walk faster side by side. She doesn’t want him to know her new desk whereabouts of which she had moved to since the last incident. Soon she creates the idea of having me take the lead to a distant coworkers desk as a decoy as the creeper was walking behind us.
Assessing the situation I realized that he was directly behind her in arms reach so any further attempts at violating personal bubbles was immenent….so I instead of taking the lead in her plan…wedged myself in between and put her in the lead telling her “I don’t know where to go, so I’ll follow you”…..I knew she wasn’t to happy with me breaking her plan ….but hey…..we can improvise at least right?….its better than him going for round 2,3,4, etc. :P
We reach the decoy desk and from there begin to laugh yet sort the adventure out in our heads. Our supervisor finds this amusing and completely understands our interns plight…..and as i reflect the lessons learned in this adventure are as followed.
1. Quick thinking goes a long way 2. HI-C is still good 3. Creepers are like ninjas….just more violating……4. Some women should really consider taking up hockey…..many have ungodly strength in hightened senses of emotions….ow my shoulder…and I’d hate to see the wall lol
as always never a dull moment and I’m